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Health For Mzansi

Liewe Lulu: I’ve become green with jealousy

Liewe Lulu has found her new home on Health For Mzansi. Every week she will offer up her shoulder to cry on as she answers letters flooding in from across Mzansi. No issue is too small or too big, the no holds barred agony aunt has got plenty of tissues…

by Noluthando Ngcakani
5th August 2022
in Liewe Lulu
Reading Time: 3 mins read
A A
Liewe Lulu: New Year cheer make me anxious

A grieving Bloemfontein mom wonders if it is appropriate to be jealous of her pregnant family member. She asks Liewe Lulu how to handle her feelings. Photo: Health For Mzansi

Heartbroken from Bloemfontein, Free State writes….

I am a mother to a beautiful three-year-old baby girl. My husband and I desperately want to expand our family, but I have suffered two miscarriages in the past year in addition to losing my mother. I am broken. I am hurting from the loss and need to take a break from trying to conceive another baby. I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that God just might not have a second child on the cards for us. I am 30 and have had fertility trouble in the past. Lulz, my issue is that my cousin is expecting her second child and I am finding it difficult to be around her. Watching her go through those changes is a reminder of where I should have been had my pregnancies lasted. It is painful to witness her fertility. What can I do? I love her and we are practically sisters.

My dearest Heartbroken

My angel, Liewe Lulu grieves with you and I am miserable that I cannot make everything right.

via GIPHY

To grieve the loss of your angel babies is as intense as anything in this life, coupled with the death of your mother. Jeepers, it is okay to feel overwhelmed, and longing when presented with the fertility of your beloved “Cuz”.

You are allowed to feel your feels. I hate to sound like an old Hallmark card, when I say “Time heals all wounds,” but your pain, it will lessen with time.

Now when you say the Big G in the sky has dealt you a “bad hand”, Liewe Lulu can help here! You sweet soul, you have two beautiful blessings in your life, your daughter and your husband. Concentrate on them, they are your strength. They will pull you back into the joys of life.

It is also important to give yourself time, see a fertility specialist and if need be, a psychologist to help you sort through your feelings.

Mama Nurture is a great resource for support for pregnancy and infant loss. Wishing you love and healing.

ALSO READ: Liewe Lulu: Hen party video kills chicken farmer’s buzz

Write to Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu has moved from Food For Mzansi, where she used to help readers in agriculture with their love life. Now, you can follow her here on Health For Mzansi. The content in this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical and/or psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding any medical condition.

Tags: AdviceAgony auntFertilityLiewe Lululoss
Noluthando Ngcakani

Noluthando Ngcakani

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HIV and initiation: Supporting boys through cultural rites Security fails as gangs target Eastern Cape clinics Dr Makanya blends spiritual healing with art therapy Canola oil: A heart-healthy choice for your kitchen No more pain! Tackle the torment of toothaches How smoking causes harmful bacteria in your mouth Discover delicious, healthy dishes that will make your heart sing Rediscover the joy of creamy pap with chicken livers