Waiting for Baby Blue from Johannesburg writes…
Liewe Lulu…
My Dearest Baby Suss…
You have two options here. Option one: if you are so pressed by Aus Thandeka and genuinely believe that she is a bad fit for your friend and up to something – then you can say something you know.
Talk to Tshepo, just be cautious not to make very judgmental comments.
If you are upset and suspicious, chances are your feelings about your friend’s partner are likely about your relationship and yourself than they are about that person.
You can say “hey Mr T, I am concerned about this behaviour I have noticed from Miss T, or I am uncomfortable with the fact the Miss T does ABC… How does it impact you?”
If you bring it up, use specific behaviour examples rather than generalize and bring up your suspicions to illustrate your concerns.
Communicate with your whole chest. Be intentional.
Also, brace yourself for the response. Bear in mind that it is your friend’s relationship. It is not about how you feel. Tshepo has actively decided to remain in the relationship. He has also decided to be a father to this baby.
Deal with it.
And then there is option two: You just support him by…wait for it! Being happy for him! If he is excited about having a baby, just go with it.
Liewe Lulu gets that you are feeling suss about how this baby came to be but there is nothing you can do about those feelings at this point. You are going to be a fun aunt! Rejoice, there is honestly nothing more rewarding.
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Liewe Lulu is Health For Mzansi’s agony aunty. The content in this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical and/or psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding any medical condition.