SUBSCRIBE
Friday, May 16, 2025
Health For Mzansi
  • Trending
  • My Health
  • Conversations
    • Podcast
    • Health Heroes
    • TV
  • Grow It
  • My Food
    • Nutrition
    • Recipes
No Result
View All Result
  • Trending
  • My Health
  • Conversations
    • Podcast
    • Health Heroes
    • TV
  • Grow It
  • My Food
    • Nutrition
    • Recipes
No Result
View All Result
Health For Mzansi

Liewe Lulu: ‘My hubby is friends with his exes’

Every week Liewe Lulu will offer her shoulder to cry on as she answers letters flooding in from across Mzansi. No issue is too small or too big, the no-holds-barred agony aunt has got plenty of tissues

by Noluthando Ngcakani
11th November 2022
in Liewe Lulu
Reading Time: 3 mins read
A A
Liewe Lulu: 'Stop checking your hubby's phone'

A weary wife is struggling to trust her ex-texting husband, but "trust is like the glue of life", says Liewe Lulu.

Axed wife from Mamelodi writes…

My hubby has been messaging his ex-wife throughout our relationship and has been hiding it from me.

I found a message from her on his phone early in the relationship – and when I asked him about it, he said that they were still friends and that he would not stop communicating with her. I let it go but I have been struggling to trust him.

I have gone through his phone many times and I found flirtatious messages from his ex-wife and an ex from back in the day. Every time I confronted him about it, he would apologise. For a while, I couldn’t find any more messages on his WhatsApp or any more SMSs from them. That is until recently when I looked through his phone, I looked on his Instagram and chains of messages from his ex-wife and his ex-girlfriend in his inbox. I have never been angrier, I asked him when last he contacted either of them, and he said that he was not cheating on me.

I guess my question is Lulz, should I call the ex-wife and ask her why she is sending my husband raunchy messages? I want to know if these messages are friendly or sexual. I don’t plan on yelling at her I just want to know.

My dearest Axed Wife…

Woohsah.

Do not text those women. It’s already hard to defend men but your husband was transparent when he told you that he maintained a friendship with his exes. The problem is that you decided to let this go. You said you were cool with it. And you lied to yourself.

Calm Down Tiffany Pollard GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

This is not about who your hubby is in contact with or not. It is about the fact that you feel something is not quite right. Pay attention to those feelings and let’s explore them.

Your current situation makes for a very unpleasant cycle for the both of you. One where he feels the need to hide his friendship with his exes from you and one where you do not trust this man.  

Trust is fundamental in a relationship.

For you guys to have a future, you need to be able to trust him with your fears and know he will try to understand them. He should not only respect them, but he should also affirm them. A relationship where you doubt both him and yourself will eventually exhaust you.

Communicate.

I would encourage you and your hubby to seek counselling to figure out the best way you can develop effective communication strategies rather than going through your husband’s phone.

Love, light and healing.

ALSO READ: There’s more to self-esteem than clicks and likes

Get the Health For Mzansi newsletter: Your bi-weekly dose of kasi health, wellness and self-care inspiration.

Write to Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu is Health For Mzansi’s agony aunty. The content in this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical and/or psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding any medical condition.

Tags: Liewe LuluRelationship adviceRelationships
Noluthando Ngcakani

Noluthando Ngcakani

Related Articles

A new father wants to break up with his long time girlfriend and the mother of his daughter. Liewe Lulu shares tips. Photo: Health For Mzansi
Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu: ‘I can’t stop sleeping with my ex’

by Noluthando Ngcakani
24th March 2023
Liewe Lulu: My married bae is cold and distant
Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu: My married bae is cold and distant

by Noluthando Ngcakani
17th March 2023

Stories

HIV and initiation: Supporting boys through cultural rites
Security fails as gangs target Eastern Cape clinics
Dr Makanya blends spiritual healing with art therapy
Canola oil: A heart-healthy choice for your kitchen
No more pain! Tackle the torment of toothaches
How smoking causes harmful bacteria in your mouth
Discover delicious, healthy dishes that will make your heart sing
Rediscover the joy of creamy pap with chicken livers
No Result
View All Result

Latest

Rooibos
Trending

Hey brew! Gen Z and Millennials fuel rooibos tea trend in SA

by Ivor Price
16th May 2025

Mzansi's younger generations just love rooibos! From traditional brews to innovative energy drinks, rooibos is the caffeine-free champion capturing the...

Read moreDetails
Buthelezi EMS

‘Unlawful’ contracts: FS ambulance firms must pay back the money

15th May 2025
Top winter crops to plant now in Mzansi

Top winter crops to plant now in Mzansi

15th May 2025
Immune booster

Boost your body with homemade immune shots

13th May 2025
Dietitian on a mission: Love, loss, and healing through food

Dietitian on a mission: Love, loss, and healing through food

12th May 2025
Health For Mzansi

Contact us
Office: +27 21 879 1824

News: hello@healthformzansi.co.za
Advertising: sales@foodformzansi.co.za

Awards & Impact
Privacy Policy

Cookie Policy
Copyright

Somagwaza

HIV and initiation: Supporting boys through cultural rites

cropped-scott-webb-yekGLpc3vro-unsplash.jpeg

Security fails as gangs target Eastern Cape clinics

Dr Sinethemba Makanya

Dr Makanya blends spiritual healing with art therapy

Hey brew! Gen Z and Millennials fuel rooibos tea trend in SA

‘Unlawful’ contracts: FS ambulance firms must pay back the money

Top winter crops to plant now in Mzansi

Boost your body with homemade immune shots

Dietitian on a mission: Love, loss, and healing through food

Fighting pregnancy fatigue: What your body might be telling you

error: Content is protected !!
No Result
View All Result
  • Trending
  • My Health
  • Conversations
    • Podcast
    • Health Heroes
    • TV
  • Grow It
  • My Food
    • Nutrition
    • Recipes

© 2021 Health For Mzansi | Farmers For Change Pty (Ltd)

HIV and initiation: Supporting boys through cultural rites Security fails as gangs target Eastern Cape clinics Dr Makanya blends spiritual healing with art therapy Canola oil: A heart-healthy choice for your kitchen No more pain! Tackle the torment of toothaches How smoking causes harmful bacteria in your mouth Discover delicious, healthy dishes that will make your heart sing Rediscover the joy of creamy pap with chicken livers