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Health For Mzansi

Liewe Lulu: ‘The distance is killing our spark’

Every week Liewe Lulu will offer up her shoulder to cry on as she answers letters flooding in from across Mzansi. No issue is too small or too big, the no-holds-barred agony aunt has got plenty of tissues

by Noluthando Ngcakani
27th January 2023
in Liewe Lulu
Reading Time: 3 mins read
A A
Missing physical affection? Here's how to make it easier. Photo: Health For Mzansi

Missing physical affection? Here's how to make it easier. Photo: Health For Mzansi

Yearning For My Love from Nelspruit in Mpumalanga writes…

Liewe Lulu, I haven’t seen my bae in three weeks. I work as a nurse and my shifts have been crazy.  I miss her so much. She lives in Johannesburg, and I live all the way in Nelspruit. We video call all the time and text regularly. But it is not enough, I miss her touch, I miss her kisses and I miss waking up next to her. She is not taking it as well as I am, and I feel our spark is slowly diminishing.  We try to do virtual dates, but the glow from our screens lacks the intimacy of physical touch. How can we keep the flame alive without having to touch each other physically?  

My Dearest Yearning lover boy … 

The absence of touch should surely make the heart grow fonder. And that sense of yearning should be the spark for your sexy flame. Use it to your advantage, babes.  

If anything, this situation should be used to explore intimacy beyond sexuality. So, your imagination is the key here, delve into it.  

Play, get wild and dig deep into your kinks. And when I say kinks I don’t mean bound, gagged or strapped. No, sweetie, I mean to explore the kinks of the mind.  

via GIPHY

The power of language is an unstoppable force in sexual gratification and lucky for us we have the technology to help us too.  

There are multitudes of adjectives that can describe certain bits and pieces, you can push the limits you know. We can get physical in so many ways that do not require us to be in the same room. 

Send risqué voice notes at random times during the day. Tease her mind with images or even short little five-second videos.

Remember, you respectively are in charge of your separate environments. Set up some ambience for those virtual dates that you think will set your lover off. Leave a little room for some mystery and keep enjoying each other by teasing each other with imagery of what to expect when you are reunited again. 

ALSO READ: Liewe Lulu: ‘Summer makes my hair dry’

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Write to Liewe Lulu

Liewe Lulu is Health For Mzansi’s agony aunty. The content in this article is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical and/or psychological advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding any medical condition.

Noluthando Ngcakani

Noluthando Ngcakani

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HIV and initiation: Supporting boys through cultural rites Security fails as gangs target Eastern Cape clinics Dr Makanya blends spiritual healing with art therapy Canola oil: A heart-healthy choice for your kitchen No more pain! Tackle the torment of toothaches How smoking causes harmful bacteria in your mouth Discover delicious, healthy dishes that will make your heart sing Rediscover the joy of creamy pap with chicken livers