Abbreviated as FOMO, the fear of missing out has become common in today’s world. It’s the feeling that everyone else is having more fun or experiencing more exciting things than you are, and with social media showing us all the highlights of everyone else’s lives, it’s easy to feel like we’re missing out.
“FOMO is a phenomenon where individuals feel anxious or insecure about missing out on social events (e.g., parties), experiences, or opportunities,” explains Nozipho Ndaba, a clinical psychologist from Pretoria. “It can further impact mental health by fostering feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, or anxiety.”
The power of social media
Vusi Mthethwa from Johannesburg details that he experiences FOMO as a curiosity fuelled by influence on what that specific thing would feel like if he participated. With social media being such a big part of our lives and so much data we consume pulling us in all directions, he mentions he does think it can contribute to mental health issues.
“FOMO can constantly feel like you are not in the right place, not doing enough, or just not enough. Instead of sitting and watching others, I read and listen to many audiobooks on psychology, spirituality, and just how the mind works. I do some exercises, like concentrating on one thing of no significance for like 10 minutes a day, to help strengthen my mind,” he explains.
“Everyone should allow a good portion of FOMO to lead them to new paths sometimes. As a human, it is great to always want a part of things outside of what you usually want; the problem only begins when you can’t control the feeling.”
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Feelings of isolation, loneliness and depression
As for Abongile Mgxotwa from the Eastern Cape, he says he has definitely experienced FOMO, particularly when seeing his friends or family members doing exciting things that he’s not involved in.
“For me, FOMO often comes up when I see photos or posts on social media of people having fun without me. It can lead to feelings of isolation, loneliness, and even depression. It can also lead to unhealthy behaviours like excessive social media use, comparing oneself to others, and obsessively checking one’s phone,” he says.
“One strategy that I’ve found helpful is to focus on gratitude. I’ve found that when I focus on what I’m grateful for, it helps to put things into perspective and reduce the anxiety associated with FOMO. Another strategy is to remind myself that social media is often a highlight reel, and it doesn’t show the full picture of someone’s life.”
Ndaba further highlights that social media often plays a significant role in contributing to FOMO and how constant exposure to online life can amplify feelings of exclusion or the fear of not measuring up.
Work on your mindset
“It’s crucial to recognise that social media portrays a curated version of reality, and everyone experiences FOMO at times. Building a strong sense of self-worth and focusing on genuine connections can contribute to a healthier mindset,” Ndaba states.
According to her, the warning signs of FOMO affecting one’s mental health include increased anxiety, comparison with others, difficulty enjoying the present moment, and a constant need to be connected to social media and behave like the people on social media.
To deal with FOMO, she advises limiting social media usage, practising mindfulness to stay present, cultivating gratitude for what you have, and fostering genuine connections with others offline.
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